德成陈博士

DAILY REFLECTION
19 October 2026

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  
Ephesians 4:29

Words are powerful. They can heal or wound, encourage or discourage, build bridges or create distance. Sometimes, a careless remark spoken in frustration can leave a wound that takes days, or even years, to heal.

Looking back on our marriage, I recognise that there were moments when I could have spoken more gently, listened more patiently, and responded with greater understanding. I have learned that winning an argument is far less important than preserving the peace and unity of our marriage.

Ephesians 4:29 reminds us that our words should build others up according to their needs. This means speaking not merely to express our feelings, but also to consider how our words will affect the person we love.

In marriage, communication is more than talking. It involves listening attentively, understanding our spouse’s feelings, and sometimes choosing silence rather than speaking in anger. A gentle response can calm a tense situation, while a sincere apology can restore a wounded relationship.

Over the years, I have discovered that three simple expressions can make a tremendous difference: “Thank you,” “I am sorry,” and “I love you.” Yet these words must come from a sincere heart and be supported by our actions.

No marriage is free from misunderstandings or disagreements. However, when both husband and wife choose humility over pride, forgiveness over resentment, and encouragement over criticism, love continues to grow and mature.

After fifty years, I am still learning. Marriage is a lifelong journey in which God continually shapes our character through the person He has placed beside us.

Prayer:  
Heavenly Father, thank You for the precious gift of marriage. Forgive me for the times my words have caused hurt rather than healing. Teach me to listen patiently, speak gently, apologise humbly, and encourage generously. May my words reflect Your love and grace, bringing peace, understanding, and lasting unity to our marriage. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

每日反思  
2026年10月19日

“污秽的言语一句不可出口，只要随事说造就人的好话，叫听见的人得益处。”    
以弗所书 4:29

话语具有极大的力量。它可以医治，也可以伤害；可以鼓励，也可以使人灰心；可以搭建沟通的桥梁，也可以拉开彼此的距离。有时候，一句在愤怒或冲动中说出的无心之言，所造成的伤害，可能需要数天，甚至数年才能抚平。

回顾我们的婚姻生活，我深深体会到，有些时候，我本可以说得更温柔一些，听得更耐心一些，回应得更体贴一些。如今我明白，在争论中赢得道理，远不如维护夫妻之间的和睦与合一来得重要。

以弗所书4章29节提醒我们，所说的话应当顾及别人的需要，使人得到造就。这意味着，我们说话不只是为了表达自己的感受，更要考虑自己的言语会如何影响我们所爱的人。

在婚姻中，沟通不仅仅是说话，更包括用心聆听、体谅配偶的感受，有时甚至需要选择安静，而不是在怒气中回应。一句温柔的话，可以平息紧张的气氛；一句真诚的道歉，可以修复受伤的关系。

这些年来，我发现三句简单的话，可以为婚姻带来极大的改变：“谢谢你”、“对不起”和“我爱你”。然而，这些话必须发自真诚的内心，并且透过实际行动表现出来。

没有任何婚姻能够完全避免误解与争执。然而，当夫妻双方愿意以谦卑取代骄傲，以饶恕取代怨恨，以鼓励取代批评，彼此的爱就会不断成长，变得更加成熟。

结婚五十年后，我仍然在学习。婚姻是一生的旅程，神不断透过祂安排在我们身边的配偶，塑造我们的品格，使我们越来越有基督的样式。

祷告：
天父，感谢祢赐下婚姻这份宝贵的礼物。求祢赦免我曾经因言语不当而伤害配偶的时刻。教导我耐心聆听、温柔说话、谦卑道歉，并常常以鼓励的话语扶持对方。愿我的言语能够彰显祢的慈爱与恩典，为我们的婚姻带来平安、理解与长久的合一。奉主耶稣基督的圣名祷告，阿们！